at the comedy show

seeking counsel from your predecessor on the phone. 'your love is what makes you so beautiful. someone worthy of it will hold that tightly and never let go.' I wonder how much of this he means, having been on the receiving end / in your position not so long ago. speaking for myself I struggle to believe even the sentiment. breathing and crying I know that I would never ask so much. in an unsuspecting winter we both seemed happy for a moment. you wanted what I wanted. devoid of expectation we were free to glow together and we did.

I took your photo as we cycled through the golden hour. you led the way in a purple jumper. a short cut down a lane. a flower just for me. we cooked Mexican and talked about the boys we left behind. in your room we made music. you said the wrinkles round my eyes could break your heart. I'd have frozen in that moment / your eyes if I could.

back row at the comedy show playing the friend someone needs. mistaking the back of a stranger for you. a hollow in my heart. seven days is a week / a lifetime / nothing at all. what is time to a heart without resolve? I wonder how you're feeling / what you're doing / if you'd know I want to know. I miss you and I hope you're keeping well.