lost media

we sang into each other's mouths

and laughed

until you'd had enough

a star falls

and the party ends on your terms

with a left turn

claws

or fractures

we are buried down the hall

between this choice and the way we were

because you want what you want

and I am what I am

and what was once the same will change

like water

scars

clouds running over stars

the way we feel

do you remember when you said my eyes could make you cry?

how much did you forget?

when we would glow our names were sacred

your eyes would open in the dark

and I could see your heart

helpless and beautiful, as terrified as mine

do you remember?

does it matter if you don't

that it was too real

that you're gone?

tonight I water dead trees

and the hollow with my tears

you are nowhere I have been

having known me for a moment

in the nettles

where old scars wouldn’t matter

and we could lie and burn together

I missed you before you left and all the gold was gone

thanking you for something

with your helmet on

leaving to become another lost weekend to mourn

without you only memory

vacant dreaming

photos, poetry, and song

frail evidence of what you wanted

a bed where we belonged

lost media forever

if forever wasn't wrong.