Tuesday, November 8, 2022

Lewes by day

early morning rise to bid Nadia farewell. I walked her to the bus in my pyjamas. heading back to Canada - she’ll be back at work tomorrow. I worry I mightn’t see her again. another farewell a couple hours later - Lukas on the doorstep of the hostel, just like in London the day after we left Lewes last time. strange parallels. we hugged Mat goodbye shortly after before catching the bus in to Lewes.
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1_kFHq75tSlnZlmrhuLvpmeUh7YevDXc8
with how often we’d been into the village throughout our trip, it was strange to think we hadn’t yet seen our old home in daylight. nostalgia flowed through us as we wandered the lanes and paths connecting the landmarks with which we bestowed a great deal of emotional significance.
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1qI8KWGtv7ACuLdrb11yvtakq9OONvYW3
we walked to the hill for a view of the town, Nash documenting our journey religiously on his camera. 
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=17Xk1v5m-vC4x8uXD8Ie3IDWnLmVgzE5v
I walked to the priory with Alex, who had not been before. fond memories here, and a real privilege to see the ruins through new eyes.
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1xmueDOvybGDQIBb-ymGMUsebKyTFoCMd
the village is haunted but the ghosts aren’t unkind.
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=13mIqX3SYWthdC5lIJrZ2lgKdy95xSYet
and the stream keeps growing. so much more to be taken away.
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1GoI2YHcd_jAoDIQl0cdmAxl4UJW-hm4x
beloved TESCO.
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1qpsnLeDOBasmd4-T0oU6pfiKtn26GKfk
our old home, a haunted house.
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1Tu_MHqWv8L29ZrnUJ6EOn60cf8kwY2CU
the tunnel.
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1a1UYNlRmBt9xvmy1Spc5yWpgUX1xrsR4
pizza dinner in Lewes, followed by a final drink at Lansdown. we tried calling people who couldn’t make it. Nate picked up, as did Emma, who seemed quite sad. I think we all were by that point, realising we mightn’t ever be back, and recognising once more that the life we knew and loved will forever sit on a shelf beyond our reach.

I say goodbye to Nash tomorrow for probably years. he’s worried me today with the question of ‘what is our friendship?’ now that we’ve come back to Lewes after all this time. the question makes my heart heavy.

it’s been a beautiful day, as cathartic as it has been surreal and sobering. feeling unprepared to part ways with my friends and the place we used to share. <<

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