winter is here now. it’s cold and the days are shorter. things are slowly going back to normal, though I still study at home each day. I also think of my adventure each night, and long to escape into that precious trove of memories. often I imagine it would be wonderful to live there.
Nash organised a group call for a bunch of us from Lewes. in the final month of our time together, he had documented a minute each evening of our thoughts, feelings, interactions and antics, all informal and at times ridiculous. he had compiled some of this content into a short video, presenting his story of his time spent at the Lewes Study Lodge. I’ve never stopped missing this time, the place, or those people. this clip was beautiful, and to relive tiny glimpses of our time together felt good for my soul. it made me happy.
we spoke for hours. a group call spanning continents and tens of thousands of miles. people across the globe who may have never been aware of each other’s existence, who could have easily lived their whole lives without crossing paths were it not for the aligning of specific chances and completely unplanned coincidences. this thought overwhelms me, and I spend a great deal of time trying to remind myself to not be scared of it.
the world has me feeling strange right now and, like many others I’m sure, I feel an urge to escape into someplace else. I spend time wishing I was able to foster some kind of helpfulness. I also spend a lot of time missing, predominantly people and shared experiences left in the past. this hasn’t changed, and part of me doubts it ever will. still, I remain grateful for the experiences that have given me purpose and reasons to recognise the potential beauty of the world. << x
