february

I see so many people persevere through ridiculous levels of hardship. there is a lot to admire, and I should use this to drive myself forward, to get back on track. but I struggle to escape the comparison trap.

I feel far from the world and the people I’ve been in the past. though I’m not lonely here, I continue to miss the places I can’t be and the people I can’t see. everything is very vague and uncertain looking ahead.

unsure of when this ends, what I’m meant to do. such a strange time, and it continues. I know I should try harder to make tomorrow a better day. most of the time it feels as though I can’t even string together a coherent thought. what a silly character I’ve become. <<